February 7th, 2004

ffxii - basch - rockstar

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Beyond this, why am I having so many panic attacks lately? 2 and a half in less than a week! Maybe I should go see Doug again. But Mom would have a hissy fit, she'd say I don't need it, I'm just worried about university. Maybe I am, but that's why I need to go see him. More than that, I need to know whether or not I should go to U of S for a year and get used to being on my own before I go to Lethbridge. Saskatoon is a hell of a lot closer (75 minutes compared to around 12 hours). Maybe I'll decide in that first year that I want to do something other than New Media. I'd rather realize that at U of S and be able to take a major there instead of realizing it in Lethbridge and being screwed!

I know I'll have panic attacks no matter where I go. I know I'll be so homesick I'll probably be physically sick. Nothing can change that, but being able to go to Saskatoon, which is so much closer and where my parents can make a weekend trip if necessary is so much better than going to Lethbridge, a city I've never been to and know no one.

Now to convince my father, who is adamant about me going to Lethbridge, after all I've done to convince him to let me go. My mom supports me in this, she wanted me to do this in the first place.
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